Some people live for a calendar filled with dinner reservations, wine nights, and workout classes. But for anyone who isn’t a social butterfly, the constant work of starting (and maintaining) conversations can be less fun and more draining.
Experiencing this kind of burnout doesn’t necessarily mean you’re shy, “lame,” or socially anxious. Rather, social exhaustion (also known as an introvert hangover) is your body’s natural way of telling you that it needs a break, Laurie Helgoe, PhD, associate clinical professor of psychology at Augsburg University and author of Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength, tells SELF. “When you interact with other people, you’re processing a lot of information, and if there’s too much at once, it’s no wonder you’ll be overwhelmed or find it hard to relax,” Dr. Helgoe says.
In many cases, the solution is simple: Get some alone time. But not all self-care is created equal, which is why we asked experts for the most nourishing and fastest ways to recharge your social battery.
1. Read or watch something fictional.
Sometimes your brain just needs a break from reality, in which case a mindless fictional escape can help. “Dive into a captivating mystery, fantasy, or romance novel, or get lost in your favorite movie or TV show,” Dr. Helgoe recommends. Not only can this boost your mood when you’re tired and cranky after something like an hours-long networking event, but immersing yourself in a make-believe world can also give your mind a chance to detach from the very real stressors of everyday life—like last night’s family drama or an intense vent session with a friend.
2. Get outside and move around.
After a busy social day, switching up your surroundings can be surprisingly restorative, according to Dr. Helgoe. The next time you’re craving alone time, ditch the bed rotting and go for a midday stroll along a scenic route. Or if you live in a bustling city, you can just sit on a park bench and listen to your favorite songs. Whatever you do, the point is that stepping outside even momentarily gives your brain a physical and mental break from that constant stimulation. On top of that, research also shows that exposure to green spaces can boost happiness and lower stress.
3. Reframe exhaustion as a sign that you had fun.
After listening to your coworker ramble on about their favorite hockey team or watching your friend swipe through 20 photos of their “adorable” dog, it’s no wonder you might be irritable, checked out, and itching to get away from everyone.
“Our brains are quick to zoom in and ruminate on the lowlights,” Ellen Hendriksen, PhD, a psychologist at Boston University’s Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders and author of How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxietytells SELF. The problem with replaying these negative moments, though, is you’re also reliving that stress and frustration—which is why she recommends reframing your fatigue a little more positively.
